23 December 2018
By Ellie Palmer
'Tis the season of annoying your brothers, sisters, parents, cousins, and anyone else you can find to wind up.
We are more than happy to supply you with these mildly awful piano-related jokes in order to help you annoy your loved ones this Christmas!
Question: Did you hear about the silly pianist who kept banging his head against the keys?
Answer: He was playing by ear.
Question: What did the pianist say to the tightrope walker?
Answer: You'd better C-sharp otherwise you'll B-flat!
Question: How did the piano get out of jail?
Answer: With its keys.
Awful. Absolutely awful.
Question: What do you call a pianist who throws garbage everywhere?
Question: What do you get when you drop a piano down a mineshaft?
Answer: A-flat minor
A student once said, 'Sir, I need to go to my music lesson now.' The teacher replied, 'Do you have a note?' Confused, the student says 'no...?' 'Ding!' replies the teacher as he plays a note on the piano.
Told you they were annoying.
Is there another fellow piano player in your household? Wind them up with this one-liner: 'I've been watching you practise. Santa's getting you a metronome for Christmas.'
Are your parents bugging you to do the post-Christmas washing up? Reply with, 'It's just not my forte,' followed by a hair flick and a dramatic exit. That'll work.
When leaving the dining room on Christmas Day, proclaim, 'I'LL BE BACH!" in your strongest German accent.
These jokes are so bad I can't Handel them.